poems, mostly metrical, and rants and raves on poets, poetry, and the po-biz (with 8-string stuff)
Random header image... Refresh for more!

Brand New Poem

Not, I think, the kind of thing I’ll send to zines, so I put it here.

Roundel: I Do All Right

I do all right: My daughter’s lost,
But in the rushing wind last night
We spoke as still-green trees were tossed

Almost to breaking, and despite
The years and miles our voices crossed,
Despite myself, we were polite:

A wishful dream; a pentecost.
I wish I may, I wish I might …
Though some night soon there will be frost,
I do all right.

I think perhaps the first line of the last stanza should be “A wishful dream of pentecost.” What say you?

Update: podcasted

http://mikesnider.org/formalblog/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/digg_32.png http://mikesnider.org/formalblog/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/stumbleupon_32.png http://mikesnider.org/formalblog/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/delicious_32.png http://mikesnider.org/formalblog/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/technorati_32.png http://mikesnider.org/formalblog/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/facebook_32.png http://mikesnider.org/formalblog/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/yahoobuzz_32.png http://mikesnider.org/formalblog/wp-content/plugins/sociofluid/images/twitter_32.png


1 RC { 11.08.08 at 12:41 am }

Yes,definitely, “A wishful dream of pentecost.”

2 Mike { 11.10.08 at 9:41 am }

Thanks for reading and commenting, Reyes. I will make that change.
Chicano Poet‘s now the third item restorerd to my poetry blogroll – I sit down to work on it and I look at that long list and suddenly I have a thousand other things to to do. But I will get them up here as well as keeping them at my former blog. So little time! and prompts like yours help.

3 Patrick Gillespie { 12.21.08 at 7:22 pm }

I’ve been looking around for other blogs – poets who can write a metrical line. I found your blog mentioned on About.Com.

This was the first poem of yours that I saw. You’re not bad. You have a graceful sense of rhythm and nicely vary the iambic beat – a better ear than a lot of the published “formalist” poets.

I don’t quite get the Pentecost reference but then I haven’t stepped inside a Church for, let’s see, over two decades. I don’t get these allusions anymore – that’s the problem.

4 Mike { 01.01.09 at 9:02 pm }

Patrick, thanks for reading and commenting. Your own site looks interesting — I’m adding it to the poetry blogroll.

5 Patrick Gillespie { 01.02.09 at 6:00 pm }

Hey Mike,

Nice to know you liked it. I’ve done the same – adding your site to my blogroll. So far, sites with poetry in a form other than free verse seem far & few between.

Leave a Comment